Tough and Time-Tested

Many years ago, when I was first pregnant with my daughters (not a typo—I have twins), I, like many pregnant women, suffered from the gamut of symptoms during my first trimester: nausea (which, contrary to its moniker “morning sickness,” lasted most of the day), exhaustion, a bit of anxiety, and the sudden emergence of a belly, seemingly from out of nowhere. When I spoke with my obstetrician about it, she gave me some woman-to-woman words of wisdom I’ll never forget: PREGNANCY AIN’T FOR SISSIES.

Fast forward more than 30 years, and I’m currently learning by observing the many older adults I cross paths with every day that OLDER AGE AIN’T FOR SISSIES, either.

Don’t get me wrong, I fervently believe #AgingisLiving. But I also recognize that older age comes with a unique set of changes and challenges that the aging most of us experience during the first half of our lives may not adequately prepare us for. Changes and challenges which, in turn, can prove to be quite confounding and frustrating.

While new advancements are being made every day to address some of our age-related physical issues, the fact is at this point, none of them is able to turn the clock back several decades and restore us to our former selves.

That is why as we begin reaching older age—our 70s, 80s, 90s, and (if we’re really lucky) beyond—we must make a point of marshaling the skills we’ve developed throughout the first part of our lives to ensure the second and third parts are at least as enjoyable and rewarding, if not more so.

Skills like patience, tenacity, tolerance, acceptance, adaptability, the willingness to learn, and resilience. The understanding that asking for—and accepting—help is a sign of strength, rather than weakness. And the knowledge that time is precious, so we must make the most of every day.

Research shows that as we reach older age, we may not see as well as we used to, hear as well as we used to, or remember things as well as we used to. But to me, the more time we spend lamenting WHAT ISN’T, the less time we spend relishing WHAT IS.

The fact is you’ve gotta be tough to be pregnant—and to be old. But the good news is both experiences can be extremely rewarding—if we remember to approach them with the right mindset.